Follow where your heart leads you, to infinity and beyond

I wish that I could cry, fall upon my knees cause even heroes have the right to dream. I'm just out to find the better part of me

It's funny how a whole bunch of things can start flooding your mind. Like memories here and there. Wah I sound like I'm dying, having flashbacks -.- But yeah. Knocked out during the afternoon just now. Woke up sweating dunno why -.- Watched the Bourne Ultimatum during dinner. Then spent whatever time I was not asleep/not eating doing the energetics revision package. Nuts, can't do a lot of them man. Then the entropy questions I forgot how to explain the things properly -.- Okay at least some work has been done. Think I shall go do the Physics EMI assignment later.

I realised I never really penned down my reflections for last week's CHS Homecoming. Wei Shian and I were sharing our thoughts on it. And yeah this is gonna be really similar in content to what he mentioned in his post. In short, the feeling was really different as compared to last year. It's like I met my form teacher Mr Thomas. But now there's nothing really much to say. Had the most a few sentences comprising of like 'how's life', 'work hard for A's', 'take care', things along that line. Not many of our batchmates went back. Heck don't think anyone from 29th went back except JZ and myself. I quote Shian, the vibe of CHS has just changed. In a few years time, NJ will be like that too. This would sound very well I dunno how people would put it, very act? But yeah, I've always been proud, and will always be, to have been a CHS student and (still am) an NJ student. Stuff might have been difficult here and there during our times in both places and we always complain a lot, but the memories and experiences we had would be unlike any other, at the very least I'm thankful for that.

My dad told me just now how I felt about staying at Leedon Heights. Straight away I questioned the intention of his query. I was half right. Seems like the 6 month building timeframe for our home would likely to be extended cause of some dunno what things here and there. Well, as mentioned umpteen times before, not saying here is bad. Location wise is good cause it's near school, facilities and stuff are kinda okay. But I guess it's the mental part that this isn't my permanent home. And that's the basis of my feeling well lost since staying here. For one the people I've been too used to going home with all take the usual route back, but I take a different one now. The places I usully hang out at, Bishan and AMK, are a bit difficult to get to and get home from. Not to mention certain other factors. Currently from what it seems, the house might only be completed during the period of after prelims, or even around A's. This is so going to suck. I miss YCK ):

To add on to the sucky things. Saw some fb convo between some people. Yeah it was about CT results that's why the convo caught my eye. Apparently there'll be a PTM soon, with those people who screwed up CTs like your truly having to see the principal most probably. I'm so looking forward to it... Never before has this ever happened to me in my life ): Then well I thought about some things too. Guess these people could be considered quite smart. Don't really know how to say it. Do your own agenda. You get the best things. Happiness, results, the stuff that people would consider would be the right thing to do right now. Maybe I should have followed them. I won't be in this situation right now if I did. It's not like anyone saw what happened anyway right? I'm probably the only idiot who bothered about it, maybe cause it affected me. Okay I really sound like some sore loser here. Now I see the thoughts plaguing my mind. I'm partially disgusted really -.- On another hand, it's quite funny to see things on fb, like how some people talk to each other. I mean, well why couldn't I have been able to do that?

Side note, discovered some new flavour of Oreo yesterday while I was at AMK ntuc with Jon. Blueberry ice cream flavour o.o Bought one since it sounded interesting. It tasted really like the ones you get for $1 with the wafer thingys somewhere around. There's that err minty cooling effect too. But I think this kind of flavour won't be what one will be able to get hooked on for a long time. The original oreo, or least the peanut butter and chocolate cream filling tastes better haha

Okay at least I've managed to purge most of the thoughts in my mind, all coming from one afternoon -.- Should be able to feel a bit better, like you know when you get rid of the pus in a wound it'll get a bit better. Same analogy here. My blog is like my rubbish bin oh man. I'm so sorry ): It's funny how I can readily try to encourage people and stuff, but when it boils down to myself I don't know what to do. Guess I need a bit of time to pick myself up. Oh well. This week, NS medical check up on Thursday. Most probably will be able to see Seah Yibin (: Maybe that's something to look forward to at least. Nuts hope I'm not falling sick again, starting to have weird stomaches here and there ._.

Need to pick up the broken pieces and carry on the trail. Please wake me up from this nightmare ): Work, work, work

It's Not Easy To Be Me (Superman) -- Five For Fighting


I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
I'm just out to find
The better part of me
I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane
I'm more than some pretty face beside a train
And it's not easy to be me

I wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
'Bout a home I'll never see
It may sound absurd but don't be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed but won't you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream?
And it's not easy to be me

Up up and away away from me
Well it's all right
You can all sleep sound tonight
I'm not crazy or anything
I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
Men weren't meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

I'm only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me
Inside of me, inside of me, yeah
Inside of me, inside of me
I'm only a man in a funny red sheet
I'm only a man looking for a dream
I'm only a man in a funny red sheet
And it's not easy, it's not easy to be me

mentally challenged @ 9:39 PM