And everything I have in this world and all that I'll ever be. It could all fall down around me, just as long as I have you right here by me
Okay, haven't exactly recovered yet. At least it's better than last night.. Went to school only for the science lectures. Mr Wong's last lecture in NJ, cause he's leaving. Chem went through planning. Didn't go for Math mock, luckily I didn't. Had a very bad headache in the afternoon and went to sleep lol. Now I can't think properly, having a hard time doing math zzz..I think I'm quite the sentimental type, like anything I've gone through with a siginificant enough impact I'll really miss it when it comes to the end. I don't really know if that's a good thing or not. On one hand, it's good that I've been able to connect with whatever I've gone through in that certain phase. Conversely, it just shows a sense of being unable to let go and move on, sticky as critics might say. As we go down to the last few days in NJ, with our graduation in a mere 2 days, I've been reminiscing a lot about things for the past few weeks I think. A lot of things came flooding back to me, not just the things in NJ, more ironically it was other times in the past too. For NJ wise, quite a number I spoke to all give the response going along the lines of 'I can't wait to get out of NJ'. Well each to his own I guess. Not sure if this kind of sentimental feeling stuff shows like well a bit of weakness in a way. I think I'm the type who can tear easily when something emotionally moving comes my way. Come Friday, I might just end up crying again... Hope not, later everyone's impression of me will change lol.. Maybe Friday will be a more appropriate time to do a reflection for these 2 years. Meanwhile, I seem to be resminiscing other things. I miss the days in green and white, I miss the days in blue. Funnily enough, I kind of miss doing drills, which kinda made my CI-ship a little boring lol. I loved parades and drill in Secondary school. Most people would call me retarded and obsessed for this. Heard it a lot of times. I never really fully understood the meaning of a rank-donning ceremony too. In D'08 I didn't really think much about it I guess, but looking back it was probably one of the best feelings to pass out of a course like that. I miss the day 29th did our last parade together in a squad. End of the year hopefully can get the video from Leonard (:
Yep I'm pretty weird to be thinking of all this. I think this time I might be impacted more due the the looming period of serving the nation. It's a full time commitment. I don't really have anyone close whom I know who has gone through NS and to uni and stuff to tell me how the path might possible be like. I can only guess. As for now, I can't seem to see anything beyond NS lol. With this, I also have to acknowledge that it will be a sad fact that I might not see most of my friends in NJ ever again after this, or at least for a very long time. I won't be able to reconnect as much with my juniors anymore either. I don't really know how people might see me as. I now that many of the friends I've made mean a lot to me. With all this, this farewell might be more impactful than the one two years ago. In that sense, I'm really going to dread Friday ):
About some things that I thought about and shared with Leon during our gathering last weekend, I guess I'm pretty neutral, don't really want to decide about anything, if there is anything to even decide about. Won't bother to think about anything, for this period at least. Screw this pentavalent transition state.. Okay I should sleep soon. Have econs make up tuition tomorrow too lol. The very last day of lessons ): By the way, Mei please cheer up!
I found this pretty meaningful, many would recognise it as the lyrics from "Never Had A Dream Come True" by S Club 7. It has many interpretations and it probably has various meanings to each of us. What's yours?
Everybody's got something they had to leave behind, one regret from yesterday that just seems to grow with time. There's no use looking back or wondering, how it could be now or might have been. And I know no matter where life takes me to, a part of me will always be with you
Discovered this band pretty recently, for those songs I like, it's the kind of style that I'm quite comfortable with. Soothing and melodious. I like this song a lot
Here By Me -- 3 Doors Down
I hope you're doing fine out there without me
'Cause I'm not doing so good without you
The things I thought you'd never know about me
Were the things I guess you always understood
So how could I have been so blind for all these years
I guess I only see the truth through all this fear of living without you
And everything I have in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me
I can't take another day without you
'Cause, baby, I could never make it on my own
I've been waiting so long just to hold you
And to be back in your arms where I belong
I'm sorry I can't always find the words to say
But everything I've ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love
And everything I have in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me
As the days roll on I see
Time is standing still for me
When you're not here
I'm sorry I can't always find the words to say
Everything I've ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love
And everything I have in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me
mentally challenged @ 11:46 PM
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