Follow where your heart leads you, to infinity and beyond

Mere words simply can't decribe the anger I'm feeling now. Haven't felt this level of fury for a very long time, and definitely not at this level. Somehow, there's a touch of disappointment mixed in as well, though anger can still be considered the more dominant emotion at the moment. Well, at least now I know why some people can get so angry that they cry or something, cause I just experienced that just now too.

Our draw is out for nationals is out, it's going to be a tough battle. Damn tired now from the double trainings, produced a lot of sweat just now during pt lol

I've nothing left to say

mentally challenged @ 9:51 PM 0 comments

Ah crap, the march holidays zipped past in a flash. Lot's of stuff happened, talk more about them later. Today, bad day, woke up feeling damn cold. Then afternoon, spent it worrying like crap over some stupid issue that keeps creating problems over and over again.. Seriously, let's just get it done and over with already zzzz. Just when I thought everything could finally go smoothly, more problems cropped up.. Problems just love to find me huh..

Anyway Happy Birthday Chun Yong!

Get well soon (:

mentally challenged @ 9:08 PM 0 comments

Can't shake this shitty feeling off. Have been having a really crappy feeling for these 5 days ): Can't believe one move is causing so much damage, even though it's probably part of the reason only. Stupid homeless feeling.. Sec 1 camp made me do quite a bit of reflection. More on that next time I guess..

I no longer have the courage to fight on

mentally challenged @ 5:54 PM 0 comments

Today sucked. It really sucked. Talk about bad timing. Even if it was just a few seconds of tears, it was still bad. Things just love to come all at once in your face. When it rains, it pours zzz. And I don't really look forward to moving

This is screwed up. Don't you love it when everything clashes together? Tomorrow's econs test is a guranteed fail now, basically because I don't know nuts about inflation, and because I have to do a bunch of things before I can even study. And I haven't done Vectors III either, nice one

FML

mentally challenged @ 10:56 PM 0 comments

Today absolutely rocks my socks. Started off with an already sucky mood for some reason. Physics practical, had some experiment which took quite a while to set up, and I took readings the wrong way -.- Gave up and koped Khai's readings. Chem test in the afternoon, can't say I studied that much, but still I made some effort okay. Anyway it was an absolute disaster for me. Screwed up big time. I'll be lucky if I can get a double digit score, I'll be even luckier if I can even scrape a pass zzz... Screwed up day. At least after training my mood was slightly lighter. Not like I can complain anyway, it's not like I'm heavily involved in many different things that are of great magnitudes. There are many others who're more busy than I am, so I don't exactly have a right to complain. Hope tomorrow will be better

Trials tomorrow

Happy Birthday Li Wei!

mentally challenged @ 10:59 PM 0 comments

Celebrated my grandma's birthday yesterday. Then evening went to my uncle's house again. Lessons today, no comments. Self training in the evening.

So where's the passion when needed the most? Where's the mood? Where's all the motivation and spirit? These few days, the only mood I seem to have is the super sian mood. Don't feel like doing anything at all. I don't see the point in anything now. Not even training. Sometimes you should just ask yourself. Why should I put in the effort and try so hard, when you don't give a damn? Why should I do things, that only result me losing out and looking like a fool all the time? Why should I even try, when disappointment is all that I'll get? Is there any use in dreaming anymore?

All I can do is just stand helplessly at the side, watching everything fall to pieces right before my eyes. Jia you!

Frustrated, sad, sian, moodless. What.the.hell @!&*&!*%$

Credits to bleachexile.com

And we fall, cut down and defeated

mentally challenged @ 10:32 PM 0 comments

Okay, yesterday was the release A level results, as well as chinese results. Didn't do well, got a D. Not exactly sure what to feel now. Disappointed might be the best word. To be honest, I kind of almost cried when I received the results. Yeah people are going to tell me like that also want to cry blah blah blah. Whatever.. The afternoon spent at Muster Parade did help to distract me a bit, though after that I still felt crappy. Was damn useless back at training anyway. Not sure why I'm feeling as such, can't say it's my best shot at the subject, but I guess I was probably hoping for one grade higher. Anyway, thanks Joanne, Clara, Milissa and Nigel for trying to cheer me up. Appreciate it (: So now the very important question is whether I should retake Chinese or not. Maybe not. See how it goes I guess..

Training today, my ball control's off. Really need to work. My confidence in my own skills has really been dropping, and my performance hasn't been good either :/ Afternoon went to do some work with Joanne and Kimberly, then after that went to Bishan library to find Jon to study again lol. Once again, reminiscence of the old times. Anyway, hope NL will be ok, after what happened on Friday. Hope nothing else happens and he recovers quickly. And cheer up Jo, things will be alright. Don't stress!

Everyone seems to be damn sian..

Song of the day: In Too Deep -- Sum 41

mentally challenged @ 11:44 PM 0 comments

Okay, haven't really blogged properly in some time. Should mention a few things first, had a friendly with RV on 10th Feb. Won after 5 periods, 11-9. Not bad, but can be better I guess lol. Oh then there was pe lesson by some miracle managed to hit 9:55 for 2.4km run. Yes! Must train to maintain that! Though for some reason my pull up count seems to be decreasing :/ Might be cause I'm tired or something haha.

Friday was road run, did my best and managed come in 26th, not bad I must say. Great improvement from last year, couldn't run for nuts during road run in 2009 haha. Managed to help Terra get some points, I think lol. Went for lunch with OG21 with Cass, Joshua and Nigel after road run. Had fun crapping with them. Great to hear they're still quite gelled together as an OG. Keep in touch with each other guys (: Saturday had court training, but my performance can be described in one word: Horrible. Couldn't shoot, couldn't dribble properly, couldn't do nuts. Then was damn cui and stuff, games totally killed me zzz. Sorry Dong Hui for accidentally hitting you with the stick :/ Went to study after training with Joanne, Kimberly and Chun Yong. Ended up going to the drive-thru Macs cause AMK library was crowded lol. Thanks for explaining vectors I and II to me Chun Yong! Family dinner at some place after that.

Sunday was mainly going to my maternal grandma's house for lunch, followed by my uncle's house. Ended up bringing homework there to do, damn loser zzz.. Did quite a bit vectors II there though. Had fun the Karoke system as well haha. Monday nothing much, did Chem after school, which caused me a big headache. Joined Joanne and Kimberly at Amk Library followed by Macs again for studying. I like the studying sessions, quite productive (: Managed to finall finish vectors II and hydroxy tutorial part 1 haha.

Today, brought my com to school to do some stuff, ended up sounding the horn half the time during GC haha. Training was nuts, 10 intervals, couldn't run properly for some reason, felt like there was a lot of resistance haha. Damn tired now zzz.. Oh yeah, saw the email from hq about recruitment of PC for NPAP haha. If I didn't have floorball I wouldn't mind trying out lol, guess I'll have to give up the dream of using a sword in a parade for a while. I know it's a dumb dream, but being a guy who kind of likes parades, I think it's cool haha. Next time maybe. Ok, what in the world am I saying...

A lot of things have been running through my mind recently, on and off. Especially so when you think of one sad thing and it leads to another zzz. Talk more about them another time I guess.

Had this song for quite some time, came from the first album I owned, which was the compliation cd Bigger lol. Has a nice tune to it. Enjoy

Song of the day: Home -- Michael Buble

mentally challenged @ 10:24 PM 0 comments